Personal Reflections

Still here. Still opening space in person in Amsterdam and online, for those navigating deconstruction, grief, and the kind of questions that don't resolve quickly and aren't meant to. Americans are flooding here in record numbers and whether back in the states or moving away for safety and hope - we are in a deep need for introspection - who are we as expat/immigrant Americans?

Maybe you experienced spiritual abuse, religious trauma, or simply woke up one day and realized the framework you'd been handed no longer fit the person you were becoming. And now you're sitting with questions that feel almost too large to hold: What does it mean to be a Christian — if I even am one anymore? What does it mean to be an American, when the country I believed in looks unrecognizable? What does faith even mean, when everything I built it on has shift

This assumption (i.e., the male natured god), exposed hidden difficulties that limited my understanding of God's wholenes or wholiness.

For the past 11 years I have experienced a desire for self-discovery and understanding growing at a rapid rate; simultaniously developing a deep longing for knowing and experiencing God. It all began with an unexpected major life transition, during which I found myself faced with a new reality and new expectations for my personal health and wellbeing. In order to move forward I would have to face my past and address the wounds and demons left behind. To move forward I engaged